Military divorce · St. Louis and across Missouri
A military divorce in Missouri is decided under the same Missouri law as any other divorce, with a layer of federal rules on top. Where you file, how retired pay is divided, what happens during a deployment and which benefits survive all turn on those federal rules, and mistakes there are hard to fix later.
Bardol Law Firm represents service members and military spouses in St. Louis City, St. Louis County, St. Charles County and Jefferson County, including families connected to Scott Air Force Base across the river.
- Whether the divorce is granted
- Custody and parenting time
- Child support and maintenance
- How marital property is divided
- Court power over military retired pay
- Servicemembers Civil Relief Act protections
- Survivor Benefit Plan and TSP rules
- TRICARE and other benefits after divorce
How Can a Military Divorce Lawyer in St. Louis Missouri Help You?
Military families face problems civilian families do not. A spouse may be deployed when papers are served, the family may have moved three times in five years, and the largest asset may be a pension that only pays out if the divorce judgment uses the exact language the Defense Finance and Accounting Service (DFAS) requires. A military divorce lawyer helps you choose where to file, protects or uses Servicemembers Civil Relief Act rights correctly, writes a retired pay division that DFAS will honor, and builds a parenting plan that works around deployments and moves.
Deployed, relocating, or facing a pension split? Find out where to file and what to protect.
Spend a full hour with an experienced Bardol Law Firm attorney going through residency, retired pay, SBP and a parenting plan that works around service. It is personalized guidance you can use whether or not you hire us afterward.
$300 · One full hour with an attorney · No obligation to retain our firm
How Does the Military Divorce Process Work in St. Louis, MO?
The steps are the same as any Missouri divorce, from petition to judgment. What changes is where you can file and how service and deadlines work.
Residency and Jurisdiction, Where Do You File?
One spouse has lived in Missouri for the 90 days before filing (RSMo 452.305). Only one spouse has to qualify.
A service member stationed in Missouri for 90 days, such as at Fort Leonard Wood or Whiteman Air Force Base, also qualifies.
Being stationed at Scott does not count as stationed in Missouri. A family living on the Missouri side may still qualify as residents.
Home of record is an administrative term the military uses for travel and allowances, not proof of where you legally live. And the place you file decides more than convenience. A court can divide military retired pay only if the service member lives in that state for a reason other than a military assignment, is domiciled there, or consents to the court’s jurisdiction (10 U.S.C. 1408(c)(4)). Filing in the wrong state can leave the pension out of the judgment entirely.
The Servicemembers Civil Relief Act
A service member whose duty materially affects the ability to appear can ask for a stay of at least 90 days, with a letter explaining the duty and a commanding officer’s letter (50 U.S.C. 3932). Asking for a stay is not an appearance in the case.
Before entering a default judgment, the court needs an affidavit on military status and may have to appoint an attorney for the service member. A default entered during service, or within 60 days after, can sometimes be reopened (50 U.S.C. 3931).
The SCRA delays a case, it does not stop it. Many service members waive formal service by signing an entry of appearance so the case can move on their schedule.
Understanding Military Pensions and the USFSPA
The Uniformed Services Former Spouses’ Protection Act lets a state court treat disposable military retired pay as property. Missouri divides the marital share in just proportions under RSMo 452.330, like any other marital asset.
Ten years of marriage overlapping ten years of service lets DFAS pay the former spouse directly. It is a payment rule, not a requirement for dividing the pension.
For divorces after December 23, 2016, the share is calculated on the member’s pay and years of service at the divorce, not at retirement.
Retired pay waived to receive VA disability pay cannot be divided, and a court cannot order the member to make up the difference.
The Thrift Savings Plan is divided with a retirement benefits court order, not a private-sector QDRO. See dividing retirement accounts.
The Survivor Benefit Plan needs its own attention. If the judgment awards former spouse coverage, a deemed election has to reach DFAS within one year of the order, or the coverage can be lost for good. Former spouse coverage also prevents covering a later spouse.
Most military families agree to a pension split before they ever talk to a lawyer.
Which court can divide retired pay, how the frozen benefit rule applies, whether SBP is included, what happens to TRICARE. One hour with an experienced Bardol Law Firm attorney before you decide can save you from choices that are hard to undo later. You will leave understanding your rights, your options, and what to do next.
$300 · One full hour · No obligation to hire us
Benefits After a Military Divorce
Coverage ends on remarriage or enrollment in an employer health plan (TRICARE). Below those thresholds, a former spouse loses military health coverage, which makes the timing of the divorce and the maintenance discussion more important.
Child Custody and Deployment, Planning for Uncertainty
Missouri decides custody on the child’s best interests under the same statute as any other case, with added protections for deploying parents. Missouri adopted the Uniform Deployed Parents Custody and Visitation Act in 2024 (RSMo 452.1200 and following).
- Deployment alone is not a reason to change custody. A court may not consider a past deployment or a possible future one, in itself, in deciding a child’s best interests (RSMo 452.1212).
- Temporary arrangements stay temporary. Parents can agree in writing to a deployment plan, and a court order during deployment ends after the deploying parent returns.
- Caretaking can be delegated. A deploying parent can ask the court to give a family member or another adult time with the child while they are away.
- A family care plan does not override the court. The military plan has to fit within the custody order, not the other way around.
A good parenting plan for a military family builds in deployments, training and permanent change of station moves from the start. See our child custody page.
One hour. Your service, your family. A plan that fits both.
For $300, sit down one-on-one with an experienced Bardol Law Firm family law attorney. We will dig into your specific situation, explain your rights and options in plain English, and map out practical next steps. This is a working strategy session, not a sales pitch, and you leave with real value whether or not you hire us.
$300 · One full hour with an attorney · No obligation to retain our firm
Financial Implications, Spousal Support, Child Support and Allowances
Basic Allowance for Housing and Basic Allowance for Subsistence count as income for child support on Form 14, even though they are generally not taxed. Special pays and bonuses can count too. When a Guard or Reserve parent is called to active duty for more than 30 days, Missouri allows support to be modified for the deployment and again on return (RSMo 452.416). Support can be collected through DFAS by income withholding. See Missouri child support and spousal support.
Legal Support for Military Families in St. Louis
We help active duty members, reservists, retirees and military spouses decide where to file, use or respond to SCRA protections, draft retired pay, SBP and TSP orders that DFAS and the plan will accept, and build parenting plans around deployments. Base legal assistance offices can explain the rules but generally cannot represent you in a contested divorce.
Your case is handled by one of our attorneys, Ann Vatterott Bruntrager, Denise N. Gabel, Mikayla Butler or Anna Palmer, with a named paralegal who knows your file. We generally return calls within one business day. Contact Bardol Law Firm to schedule a consultation.
Not sure how this applies to your situation?
Bardol Law Firm handles family law and nothing else, in St. Louis County, St. Louis City, St. Charles County and Jefferson County. We generally return calls within one business day.
FAQs
Can a service member file for divorce in St. Louis while stationed overseas?
Often, yes. If either spouse has lived in Missouri for the 90 days before filing, the case can be filed here even while the service member is overseas. Whether a Missouri court can also divide retired pay depends on the service member’s legal residence, domicile or consent.
How long does a military divorce take in St. Louis?
At least 30 days after filing, often several months. An agreed case can finish soon after the 30-day minimum. A contested case, a deployment or an SCRA stay of 90 days or more can add months.
What happens to custody if a parent is transferred to another state?
The Missouri order stays in effect. A move can be a reason to modify parenting time, but a deployment alone is not a reason to change custody under Missouri law.
What if a service member does not respond to divorce papers?
The court cannot simply enter a default. It needs an affidavit on military status, may appoint an attorney, and must consider an SCRA stay. Once the member can take part, the case moves forward.
Does BAH count in a divorce settlement?
Yes, as income. Housing and subsistence allowances count as income for child support and are considered for maintenance. They are not property to be divided.
This page provides general information about Missouri and federal law affecting military divorce and is not legal advice. Federal rules and DFAS requirements change, and every situation is different. Reading this page does not create an attorney-client relationship.
The choice of a lawyer is an important decision and should not be based solely upon advertisements.