If you have spent years at home with children, or years earning much less than your spouse, how to survive financially after divorce is probably the question underneath all the others. It is also the one people are least willing to say out loud.
So here is a direct answer about what Missouri actually provides, and what it requires first.
How to Survive Financially After Divorce, Where Do You Start?
Most people rely on some combination of three things, spousal maintenance, a larger share of the marital property, and their own earning capacity, and the first of those has a real test attached to it.
None of it is automatic. The honest version of this answer starts with the test rather than with reassurance.
What Does Missouri Require Before Awarding Maintenance?
Two findings, and if either one fails there is no maintenance award at all.
Under RSMo 452.335, before a court can order maintenance it has to find both of the following about the spouse asking for it.
- That the spouse lacks sufficient property, including the marital property they were awarded, to provide for their reasonable needs.
- That the spouse cannot be self supporting through appropriate employment, or is the custodian of a child whose condition or circumstances make it appropriate that the custodian not be required to seek employment outside the home.
Notice how the first one works. Property comes first.
A spouse who receives a substantial share of the marital estate may have their reasonable needs met from it, which affects the maintenance analysis. Those two questions are connected rather than separate.
Only after both findings are made does the court move to amount and duration, weighing ten listed factors. Our pages on spousal maintenance and spousal support generally go further into that.
Can Property Division Help Instead of Maintenance?
Yes, and it is often the stronger route because it is final.
Missouri divides marital property “in such proportions as the court deems just” under RSMo 452.330. The first factor the statute names is “The economic circumstances of each spouse at the time the division of property is to become effective.”
That factor expressly includes the desirability of awarding the family home, or the right to live in it, to the spouse who has custody of the children.
So a real disparity in earning capacity is already relevant to how the property gets split, not just to maintenance.
Two practical differences between the two routes.
- Property division is final. RSMo 452.330 makes it an order not subject to modification. Once it is done, it is done.
- Maintenance can change. It can be modified later on a substantial and continuing change, which is both a protection and an uncertainty depending on which side of it you are on.
Our page on division of property covers how the split works.
Does Child Support Help You Support Yourself?
No, and it is worth being clear about this because the assumption causes real budgeting mistakes.
Child support is money for your children’s costs. It is calculated from both parents’ incomes and the overnight schedule, and it exists for the child rather than for the receiving parent.
It will appear in your household budget, because your children live in your household. It is not a substitute for your own income and it should not be planned as one.
It also stops. Support obligations end, and a plan that depends on them ends with them. Our page on child support covers the calculation.
Should You Go Back to Work Before the Case Is Over?
Probably, and it is worth one conversation with your lawyer first, because the timing interacts with a maintenance claim.
Here is the tension nobody explains. The second threshold in RSMo 452.335 asks whether you are able to be self supporting through appropriate employment. What you are earning, and what you are capable of earning, both bear on that question.
That is not an argument for staying out of work. Being employed is better for your finances, your options and usually your state of mind, and courts consider earning capacity whether or not you are actually earning.
It is an argument for telling your lawyer what you are planning before you do it, so the record reflects reality accurately rather than by accident.
Things worth raising in that conversation.
- What you were earning before you stopped working, and when.
- What retraining or credentialling would take, in time and cost.
- Whether childcare makes full time work realistic right now.
- Whether a vocational assessment is likely to feature in your case.
What Should You Do First?
Build an actual number for what you need each month, before anyone argues about what you are entitled to.
Anyone working out how to survive financially after divorce should start with these five things rather than with the law.
- Write down your real monthly costs. Housing, utilities, food, insurance, transport, childcare, medical. Not an estimate.
- List every asset and account, including ones in your spouse’s name, and every debt.
- Pull your own credit reports so you know what is in your name.
- Work out your own income position honestly, including what you could earn.
- Bring all of it to the first meeting. A lawyer can tell you a great deal from those four things and almost nothing without them.
That work is unglamorous and it is the single most useful thing you can do. Every argument about maintenance and property runs on those numbers.
What Should You Avoid While the Case Is Running?
Three things cause more damage than anything else, and all three feel reasonable at the time.
- Guessing at your budget. A number you invented will be tested, and it will not hold.
- Assuming maintenance is automatic. It is not, and planning around it before the two findings are made is how people end up stuck.
- Making financial moves without asking. Closing accounts, moving money or taking on debt during a case can carry consequences that have nothing to do with your budget.
Who Can Help You Plan for Life After a Divorce in St. Louis?
The useful first conversation is arithmetic, not law, and it is not as frightening as it sounds once it is on paper.
Bardol Law Firm practices only family law, and we are in the Clayton, St. Louis City, St. Charles and Jefferson County courts regularly.
Bring your monthly numbers and what you know about the assets, and we will tell you plainly what maintenance is likely to be available, where property division does more work, and what to sort out first. If the answer is that things will be tighter than you hoped, we would rather you hear that from us early than find out later.
Working out how to survive financially after divorce is a question worth asking early, and you are not the first person to be frightened by it. Our other family law questions and answers cover the rest.
Every client gets a named paralegal on the file, and we generally return calls within one business day. Call 314.918.0100 or reach us through our contact page. Family Law, Simplified. Fill out the form or call to set up a consultation.
This page is general information about Missouri law and is not legal advice. Every case turns on its own facts. The choice of a lawyer is an important decision and should not be based solely upon advertisements.